Thursday, August 28, 2008

Dancing With the Stars Season 7: Sizing up the Competition


With the cast of the seventh season of Dancing With the Stars revealed I've decided to take a look at the contestants and see how they stack up. I've arranged them from who I think will be eliminated first all the way down to who I think will win.

Long Shots:

Kim Kardashian – Partnered with Mark Ballas

Chance of Making it to Top 3: 7500 to 1
Chance of Winning: 10000 to 1

Reasons For: Her bum looks like melons. She has a TV show and a movie coming out soon.
Reasons Against: If people actually know who she is, she might have a chance. If people know her from her scandalous sex tape and her run-ins with TMZ, I doubt they would vote for her.

Cloris Leachman - Partnered with Corky Ballas

Chance of Making it to Top 3: 400 to 1
Chance of Winning: 1000 to 1

Reasons For: She’s a legend. I’m sure a lot of people know who she is, at least as an obscure Family Guy pop culture reference and an occasional voice for them.
Reasons Against: How old is this woman? I doubt she could survive the grueling practices. She claims that she has tried out for this show 3 times before being picked; that’s never a good sign.


Jeffrey Ross - Partnered with Edyta Sliwinska

Chance of Making it to Top 3: 200 to 1
Chance of Winning: 200 to 1

Reasons For: I don’t know, he’s funny?
Reasons Against: Comedians tend not to fare well as of recently. Even if he could get on a unicycle, I doubt his chances are any good.


Decent Chances:

Brooke Burke - Partnered with Derek Hough


Chance of Making it to Top 3: 100 to 1
Chance of Winning: 75 to 1

Reasons For: She’s a pretty girl, and if she could make it to the breakdown (like Shannon Elisabeth) she might make interesting television.
Reasons Against: The pretty face really hasn’t been able to win this show. Looking at former “pretty girl” contestants, Willa Ford and Miss USA haven’t done well and although Shannon Elisabeth did decently, lost to a guy with an injured arm and a fat Broadway star.

Rocco Dispirito - Karina Smirnoff

Chance of Making it to Top 3: 20 to 1
Chance of Winning: 15 to 1

Reasons For: We’ve never had a chef on before. Maybe his other forays into Reality TV (Like Kim Kardashian) gives him a little bit of a camera advantage. I think people will give him a slight chance, albeit a better chance than Kim.
Reasons Against: Most people won’t care who he is. If he doesn’t dance well, he will be out early.

Ted McGinley - Partnered with Inna Brayer

Chance of Making it to Top 3: 19 to 1
Chance of Winning: 20 to 1

Reasons For: I still remember him as Jefferson on Married With Children. He’s a well known actor and I believe he could at least survive half of the cast.
Reasons Against: He seems like he’s going to be the Steve Gutenberg. If he gets all cheesy on the TV I’m not voting for him. Inna being new may be a good thing or a bad thing.

Warren Sapp - Partnered with Kym Johnson

Chance of Making it to Top 3: 17 to 1
Chance of Winning: 10 to 1

Reasons For: He’s a pretty well known football player and many football players have shown to be quite successful.
Reasons Against: He may just mess up too early for forgiveness. Really, this show is aimed towards women more so than it is for men and if they don’t vote for him he might not make it.

Middle of the Road:

Cody Linley - Partnered with Julianne Hough

Chance of Making it to Top 3: 8 to 1
Chance of Winning: 10 to 1

Reasons For: He’s a Disney kid. If he’s as trained in multiple media as the rest of the Disney kids, he may have a chance. He might also have a bigger fan base than I think he actually does.
Reasons Against: Seeing Sabrina not make it 2 seasons ago, maybe Disney Channel stars don’t have as much pull as I thought they would.

Maurice Greene - Partnered with Cheryl Burke

Chance of Making it to Top 3: 6 to 1
Chance of Winning: 5 to 1

Reasons For: I’m going to call this a gut feeling on my part. I think he could do better than the football player. He’s paired up with Cheryl Burke and that might be enough of a saving grace for him. Her fanbase may be able to save him early rounds.
Reasons Against: I doubt he still has a fanbase. He probably splits the vote between him and Warren Sapp in the beginning. When one goes, the other will do better and I think Maurice has more potential.


Toni Braxton - Partnered with Alec Mazo

Chance of Making it to Top 3: 6 to 1
Chance of Winning: 4 to 1

Reasons For: She’s Toni Braxton. If anyone was alive in the 90s you could name at least one song from her. I know many people (like me) who knew her Behind the Music verbatim. She has some Broadway training with her Disney connections.
Reasons Against: She is known to have a heart condition. She may just be on this show to possibly die and have good ratings. I don’t consider her much of a ringer because she never danced much when she was singing back in the day.


On Paper, Your Top 3:

Susan Lucci - Partnered with Toni Dovolani

Chance of Making it to Top 3: 5 to 1
Chance of Winning: 3 to 1

Reasons For: The Heart and Passion. I thought Priscilla Presley had a better chance than she did with her elegance. I’m crossing my fingers and hoping that she can make it through. Susan I can see having the acting side of dance down. Toni is also able to get the best out of his partners and I’m sure he can do well with Susan.
Reasons Against: She’s older than most of these contestants and she may be stiff.


Lance Bass - Partnered with Lacey Schwimmer

Chance of Making it to Top 3: 4 to 1
Chance of Winning: 3 to 1

Reasons For: Fellow Boy Banders Joey Fatone, Joey Mcintire, and Drew Lachey have done well on this show, if Joey had the support, Lance should have an equal (if not more) fanbase. Having Lacey, people might remember her from So You Think You Can Dance and they might be voting just for her.
Reasons Against: I’m sure there are a handful of homophobic people out there that may not vote for him straight off the bat, and that’s really sad. Lacey was known to mug for the camera a lot and she’s new to the whole thing and may not know how to choreograph as well as others. At least she’s not Benji.

Misty May-Treanor - Partnered with Maksim Chmerovskiy

Chance of Making it to Top 3: Even
Chance of Winning: 2 to 1

Reasons For: She should be able to ride the Olympic Wave for the beginning episodes. She has the competitors’ passion and drive and her personality is one that could actually match Maksim. Like with Laila and Mel B, he should be able to whip her into shape easily. Also Olympic Medalists have been doing quite well as of recently.
Reasons Against: Maksim has a tendency of messing up the Freestyle section, so when they make it there I hope Misty will speak up. Their attitudes may explode early on and she could go home.

So my final three on paper is Misty, Lance, and Susan. Though anyone this season has a good chance if they get a good night and someone else falters. But that’s the way the disco ball turns.

3 comments:

Kim Kardashian has a Big Ass and a sextape said...

You Can go on Dancing with the Stars
But Please Don't Lose that Ass

Jenny said...

I'm SOOOO excited for this. I'm hoping you will have full coverage much like the other shows you have coverd, I love reading your recaps.

Anonymous said...

I have a strange feeling Kim will have this one.

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