Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Shocker!!! Nice Guys Stick Around and the Bionic Booty Gets the Boot!

Well, I pretty much "watched" this twice, once while babysitting my grandkids (and really not seeing or hearing much) and once again on TiVo, and the result was still the same - Lil’ Kim & Derek say goodbye. After listening to the hype about the "shocking (that wasn’t shocking)" elimination of Chuck & Julianne last week, and not hearing anything this week, I assumed (as most of you did, I’m sure) that Ty & Chelsie were gone this week. NOT! The bionic booty has been booted! And she is a much better dancer than Ty, the nice guy. I guess the cowboy nation got moving on their cell phones and computers and proved they’re a force to be reckoned with! I’m just speechless. (Well, not really. I do have to finish this recap....)

Melissa & Tony begin the show with the Encore Dance, dancing their Samba. I guess this time they taped her top down really well, no hint of a costume malfunction!

In the Confessional after last night’s performance, Ty offered "when I was doing the Rumba move, I could tell Mommy liked!" Maybe he did get lucky after sure wasn’t that leopard robe!

Dance Center is back. Kenny Mayne starts talking about Ty and says this show is finally rewarding bad dancing. Len sticks up for him saying he’s a very good dancer. They talk about Ty being robotic, and we hear robot sounds as he dances. Lil’ Kim is next, and they pick on Len, as we watch Carrie Ann and Bruno give her 10s while Len gives a 4. Kenny says that Len’s not getting any love at home. They talk about her "assets" and Len says that "she’s got the gear in the rear, she might as well use it." They laugh at Mark’s facial expressions and say he’s turning into a chipmunk - with photos to back up their claims -and show two chipmunks dancing.

Some guy came up to sing, it was Jamie Cullum - wasn’t all that interested (my TiVo viewing was running into the Red Wings game against Anaheim, so sorry, folks, I didn’t even listen). I did enjoy watching Agnieszka Kazmierczak and Urs Geisenhainer (gesundheit) dance in fast forward, though!

"In no particular order" we get the first couple safe: Gilles & Cheryl. They look like kids that won a basket of bubble gum!

Back to Dance Center. Melissa is next, Kenny talks about how she had to endure national embarrassment at the hands of "one man" - and they show Tony. Len says he’s only known Tony to be a complete gentleman. They show a practice where Tony is laughing as Melissa grabs her rib cage. Kenny then says Gilles is prostituting himself and "will get naked at the drop of a hat. I don’t see what the big deal is, he doesn’t have that great a body" and we’re treated to the three guys (Jerry Rice, Kenny Mayne and Len) sitting there with their shirts off. At least Jerry is still in a bit of shape - but Len has a tattoo. Kenny Mayne is probably the whitest guy on TV. My stomach is now churning!

The Macy’s Stars of Dance was interesting - a huge star was in the center of the stage and the dancers hung in various places and danced around it. It fascinated my grandson and catapulted him into question mode: "Is that a star, grandma?" "Why are they jumping on the star?" "They’re not jumping, they’re dancing, honey." "No, grandma, they’re jumping. That boy over there is going really high on the star. Will he fall off?" "I hope not, honey." "He would cry. Why does that girl hang upside down?" "She’s dancing, honey." "I listen to that song with Mommy in the car." Adorable kid, I love to hear his perspective on things!

The new professionals-to-be are coming up. Afton and Cody are up first. Afton’s first two partners have been eliminated, and she’s wondering if that’s her fault. He’s working on Hannah Montana, and rehearsing with Afton until midnight and practicing during his lunch hour on the set. Cody’s immaturity hasn’t changed, and Afton has to put tape on his mouth. They are dancing the Samba and even with all of Cody’s experience on this show, he still can’t move his hips. I’m not really impressed with the choreography. Len says that Afton did a good job teaching "wooden" Cody. Bruno said she made Cody to sell himself. Carrie Ann said her skills were brought out and Cody is cute.

More results - the next couple going to the semi finals is Melissa & Tony. I feel good for Tony, he looks so happy and he deserves it.

Mayo is dancing with Lisa Rinna, she of the overly puffy lips. She’s saying he’s so tall (they have a 9-inch height difference) and she has to get used to his body. "It’s like having sex with somebody else, I have to get used to it." They’re dancing the Quick Step. It was pretty cute, perky, and Mayo choreographed himself a part where he took off Lisa’s skirt. Bruno complimented him on using Lisa’s assets. Carrie Ann felt they got a little out of control. Len said they pushed the boundaries with a cartwheel and a bit of a striptease, but well done. Lisa said Mayo was a great teacher, "making this old dog do new tricks!"

Anna is going to dance with Maurice Green. They’ll be dancing the tango, and Anna says that he picked the dance - "Why would he pick a dance he’s never done before?" Their Tango is pretty darn good! Carrie Ann said with a performance like that, they could be heading to the semi finals. Len said Anna brought out the most in her celebrity. Bruno called her a miracle worker. Maurice said Cheryl was a good teacher but Anna is good too. Tom tells us that next week, the two pros left will have to choreograph a Latin and Ballroom dance and perform them with one of the pros.

Shawn & Mark are told they are safe, leaving Lil’ Kim & Derek and Ty & Chelsie in the bottom two. Asked if Ty goes, Len said it would be a shame because it’s been fascinating to watch him improve, and they would miss Lil’ Kim’s bionic booty. Here comes the music and .... WOW! Lil’ Kim and Derek are gone! Not as shocking as when Sabrina was ousted, but still! Tom says that there was a real shock in this room and that he loved watching her dance. Derek is very complimentary, saying that she is one of his favorites. Ty looks shell shocked that he’s still around (as was most of the audience) and almost embarrassed, like he knew he should have gone. Let’s just hope they voting audience gets their heads out of their collective asses and votes properly from now on - for the best dancer, not the nicest or most improved. I think it should come down to Melissa and Gilles for the Mirrorball Trophy - what do you think?

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WARNING: Big Brother Spoilers!

We watch the current season of Big Brother on CBS and the Feeds. We watch all Big Brother 24 coverage and DVR it and watch it again. There will be posts about things we have seen from watching Big Brother 24/7. If you are a casual viewer of the CBS show-only or do not want to read any spoilers, do not read our posts dealing with the Live Feeds.