Thursday, October 9, 2008

Survivor Gabon: Episode 4 (AKA It’s hard out there for a pimp)

Last Week: “Sugar” found the Hidden Immunity Idol and Kota lost their first immunity. Paloma went home. In Jeff’s version he makes Fang sound like the stupidest team still even if they won two challenges. He also points out that Kelly was also the only other person who voted for Ace. Probably some tragic foreshadowing?

We’re back from Council and Kelly is worried about being next. She wants to get rid of Ace. Ace is also “in pain” after the vote. Ace wants to get rid of Kelly.

Credits: They edited out the people that are gone already. Only after “three” (it’s actually 4 but the first two were merged) episodes. But the hippos and gorillas remain! Take note Tyra Banks; adjust your credits after makeovers; it’s not hard.

We’re at Fang and Ken wants to make Sweet Rice. Randy is worried about rice rations. There should be one meal a day. Are they still at three? Randy points out that there is an A and B group: Crystal/GC/Ken and Susie/Randy/Dan/Matty. B-Group talks about cutting out GC. Matty feels confident about the group standing for a while.

Bump-Bom! The tribes come in and Jeff reminds us that Paloma is gone. Today is a tribal rank. It is by Importance to the tribe. Everyone gets a private area to take the test. It must suck to be considered 8. Kota has Marcus, Ace, Bob, Charlie, Jacque, Corrine, Sugar, and Kelly is least valuable. She’s a little stunned. Ace calls her a Cow in confessionals. Fang has: Matty, Dan, Randy, Crystal (who’s a little pissed that she’s 4), Ken, GC (who is a little scared that Ken was picked before him), and Susie who is the least valuable. Marcus was surprised that Randy was 3. Randy points out that this is all about friendliness. Jeff drops the bomb that the tribes are going to switch. Matty feels like an idiot.

Marcus and Matty are going to become captains of their same tribes. Marcus picks Dan. Matty picks Ace. Dan picks Charlie. Charlie still swoons over Marcus. In confessional he uses the words “LOVE” and “MARCUS” in the same sentence. Ace picks Crystal. Charlie picks Randy. Crystal picks Jacque. Randy picks Corrine. Jacque picks Ken. Corrine (after discussion) picks Susie. Jeff talks to GC and GC talks about how he must have rubbed people the wrong way. Ken talks to his group. Jeff asks Bob how he feels and he’s unsure; he talks to Matty and picks Kelly. Susie picks Bob. Kelly (clearly) picks GC. Sugar goes to Exile Island again. After tribal council, she joins the team that loses. Luckily she has an apple (or so she hopes) and a hut.

If that paragraph above is confusing:
Fang: Matty, GC, Crystal, Ken, Ace, Kelly, Jacque
Kota: Marcus, Charlie, Corrine, Randy, Bob, Susie, Dan
Exiled: Sugar

We’re returned to the New Kota and Randy is afraid if they lose he may be going home. They talk about how amazing Bob is around the camp. Susie talks strategy and decides to be a worker bee and hopes to get in good graces with the remaining of Onion Alliance.

Exile: Sugar picks comfort and there are more fruit than just an apple today. She chills in a hammock. She takes a dip in her little pond and lays down on her little boardwalk. Lucky girl.

Fang returns and the other tribe is a little on nerve. Ace again takes over in this tribe. Kelly talks about how it was Paloma/Kelly vs. the world. Jacque talks smack in front of Kelly. Crystal talks to Ken about considering getting rid of Ace since Kelly would throw a vote to Ace. Kelly uses the term “G Sizzle” as a name. Crystal calls Ace a Pimp after Kelly claimed that he slept with more than just Sugar. Ken talks about his game with girls for a little, I’m sure he used comparison how he’s Link and he’s saving his Zelda.

Tree Mail! It’s some Water-Polo/Lacrosse mix. Randy and Susie practice as Marcus talks about considering keeping Susie (because she’s a worker bee) over lazy Randy.

Challenge time. There’s a ball, paddles, passing, tubes, and a goal. It’s something a kid would create if he had a swimming pool, a ball, lacrosse sticks, and a few lifesavers. Jeff tosses one ball out and everyone struggles. Jacque gets to the ball first, but Marcus gets the ball. It seems as though no one was blocking Marcus. He passes to Randy and he makes the goal (to a non blocking Ace). Second ball and Matty is gunning for the ball as Fang messes up. Marcus aces the world. Ken and Crystal scream at Kelly to move. Fang kinda just stands there and Randy makes another goal (this time with no goalie). Third Ball: Again, Marcus is out there to the ball. Ace tries to block. Kelly chills. Ken & Crystal suck at this challenge. Marcus tosses to Randy, and Randy misses. Dan tries to go, but Matty blocks. Randy gets the ball, but Ace dives. Randy gets the ball again and makes a goal. Kota (clearly) wins. Jeff talks smack to Fang again.

Just as a defense: Charlie/Corrine/Susie didn’t really move around much either. Granted, they were probably defense.

Fang goes home depressed. Ace makes some comparison to them being Chickens and Kota being Weasels. Ken didn’t know how to steer. Jacque complains about how hard it is to play defense. “GC” has a talk with Crystal and Ken(ny) to consider getting rid of Kelly. Ken is a little nervous, but okays it. They talk about Sugars’ immunity idol and how she could give it to Ace. Matty comes over to ask and although he agrees to get rid of Ace or Jacque he wants Kelly out. Crystal reminds him that Sugar/Ace/Jacque may align. Matty has a talk with Jacque and it scares her. Ken talks to Jacque and Jacque complains about Kelly. I love how the girls will talk to the dork. Wasn’t Jacque part of the Onion alliance? Ken forwards her to Crystal. Jacque talks to Crystal next and I must give her credit for busting her ass talking to everyone. Can she cry her way to Crystal’s better graces? We’ll find out.

The tribes make it over to council. Jeff talks more smack to Fang. I really hate his bias. Matty talks about keeping the Tribe strong. Ken(ny) talks about building trust with time. Matty realizes that Ace is strong and he needs a challenge fighter. Jacque talks about teamwork and how she was trying hard. Kelly throws Ken and Crystal under the bus. Crystal counters and she goes a neck move. There’s some more banter and Matty votes first. Ace votes Kelly; that’s the counter to our Tragic Foreshadowing from the beginning of the episode. Kelly votes for “Jackie”. Jacque votes for “Kelli”. Geez, it’s like last week when Kelly spelled Ace with a cent sign.

Jeff gets the votes and reads them: Jackie, Kelli, Kelly, Jackie, Jacky, and Jackie. I love spelling names. Jacque’s torch is snuffed and she is peeled out of the Onion. Jeff reminds us that Sugar will return to Fang next week.

Next Week: Elephants wander in Fang’s tribe. GC disappears. Pimps. You can never track them.

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